SPECIAL

Hey ya’ll sorry I’ve been ghost for a minute but I never forgot about ya. Just been doing a lot lot lot lot lot. Got school all morning, work all night, and all the free time I have been in the studio trying to perfect my music. I’m getting ahead of myself, more about that later. Lol… But yea, it’s been real hectic.

But anywhos… I have something really special that I wanna share with ya.

I attended Bible study (it’s a weekly thing for me. It’s my crack. It doesn’t matter what I’m doing or what’s going on, I make sure I get there.) on Wednesday. I had the pleasure of being accompanied by my “brother from another mother.” Lol. He’s my friend in the physical world and also the spiritual. I’ll call him Songs because he is my singing inspiration.

Ok. So I’ve mentioned my pastor before. He’s the greatest. He really connects with each and every single person sitting in the crowd. He’s full of wisdom, has healing strengths given to him by the Anointed one, teaches you exactly what you need to know to strengthen your relationship with Him, and plus he’s ridiculously funny. He dresses very sharp; razor like if you will. He stays in a suit and tie every time we see him. But on this particular day he came out with just a button down shirt and jacket. His wife joins him; they pull up chairs and sit in the middle of the floor. He says “I wanna get personal. I wanna talk to you about Love. About your marriages, about divorce, about anything that you have on your mind. Grab a hold of the mic, stand up, and talk to me. What’s going on?”

One particular man comes up and, long story short, says that he was married for 19 years and she left him. He was the perfect man. Nurturing, caring, providing, and did everything for her, and she just up and left him.

Pastor laughs. He says “Sooo, you were a perfect man, and she just up and left you? Really?... So what are you leaving out?”

The man laughs. “Nothing. I did everything right. I prayed about it and everything.”

“Well you gotta be leaving something out man. Ain’t no woman gonna leave a man that’s all that.”

“No, I didn’t…”

“ You must not have been hitting it right.”

Laughter roars among the congregation. That’s how Pastor is. He isn’t all “Let’s get the Holy Ghost and sing and dance and praise the Lord” He keeps it real. He preaches what you can really utilize in your everyday life. Knowledge isn’t worth anything if it isn’t applied.

“No man, I swear I did everything right… Well… I mean, I wasn’t perfect all the time”

“Oh ok, NOW we getting somewhere.” Lol

Basically his response was: People are selfish. It’s always me me me. I wanna be happy; I wanna be with you because you make me feel good. And when you get hurt you lash out. Hurt people make stupid decisions. People always tend to blame the other person for their relationship failures. It’s always “He/she did that, and he/she did that and that and THAT. And I didn’t do nothing wrong. What you SHOULD do is pray about it. Talk to them. And instead of pointing the finger, turn it at yourself. Ask the other person what YOU are doing wrong and you embetter (sp?) YOURSELF first. When you change yourself people around you will change.

- A woman grabs the mic and says that she and her husband are going through some really rough times. He doesn’t speak to her nicely, the financials are plummeting, and they’re arguing everyday. They have kids together and she wants to make it work, but she’s getting really tired and aggravated and don’t know how much longer they can do this.

Pastor says that according to Him. Love NEVER fails. If you love the person, nomatter how bad they treat you, nomatter how much they try to resist, love will conquer. A person, nomatter how far off, will change for the better if they see how much you love them. Don’t be stupid and stay in an abusive relationship, use your common sense. But if they are worthy, don’t leave them just because you have problems. Stay through the thick and thin, love them, pray for them, and they’ll see the God in you and realize how good of a person they have and turn their life around.

- A woman comes up and says that she and her (female) friend have been best friends for years, even before she met her husband. But he has a problem with them hanging out constantly; he feels like he has to fight for her attention. She doesn’t understand why he is uncomfortable with it since the friend was there before he was even in the picture.

Pastor says “So why didn’t you marry your best friend then?” (scattered laughter. Numerous people seem to agree with her.)

"First of all, your friend is single. Her lifestyle is completely different from yours and you shouldn’t hang like you’re still single. Marriage is the ultimate relationship. One should be devoted 1^st to God, and then to their spouse. Your spouse shouldn’t have to fight for your attention; he should have your full, undivided. No man or woman should come between a husband and wife’s relationship. If they do, then that man/woman has to be cut out of the picture. Period. Pastor says that there isn’t such a thing as “I’m going out to dinner with my friend (person of the opposite sex.) If you’re gonna be anybody’s friend you’re gonna be MY friend. Not my wife’s. You don’t have any business going out to dinner with her. Men are natural initiators. It is unnecessary business."

--

As we were walking to the car I said to Songs,
“That’s so funny. Some of the things that he said you’ve already told me. You’re a loser. You ain’t great. Lol.”
“I know I know, I’m the truth.”
“Shut up. You suck”

The story behind that is: I’m not the same person I was when I met him. I didn’t devote my life to the Savior until last year. My family is Buddhist, but they never really were actively involved, so I basically grew up Atheist. I was always in Chorus singing Gospel songs and praising him, but I never knew Him like that. Yet something in me was always drawn to Him. And when me and Actor were together he took me to church and sealed my devotion to Him. I got saved and from then on my life was never the same… One time, me and Actor had gotten into an argument and I was asking Songs for advice. He told me the exact same things that Pastor said “Love him, nomatter how wronged you feel. Love him, take care of him, and he’ll see it… etc.”

We talked about how our friends should have been there for that service because all of us have relationship problems. Mainly unworthy ones. To God, all of us (being in our 20s, unmarried) are nothing. The only relationship that God sees is marriage. So here we are, sleeping together, living together, getting into arguments about other people and how unappreciated you feel and blahzay blah. We’re acting like we’re married and having the same problems and arguments that married couples have.

People are so territorial. “He’s mine. She’s mine. Nobody can have her but me.” NO. YOU'RE WRONG. She’s not yours; he’s not yours. They are God’s children. They don’t belong to you. They’ll never be yours. Once you learn how to accept that you can both move on, praise him together, live according to his word, and your MARRIAGE will be an everlasting one.

Thanx for reading. Until next time... Akanke